Some Random Thursday Thoughts

Just a few things I have to get off my chest in no particular order:

--I have very few inhibitions when it comes to dancing anymore. I am not getting less awkward as the years pass. I am a 6'4 225 pound white boy who still is not completely competent when it comes to his own body mechanics. That said, I do the funky chicken, the ghetto booty shake, and my personal favorite-the random household chore dance where i simply mimic the vacuuming move and the sweep the porch maneuver to perfection on the dance floor. I know how to work that. Speaking of "Work that", one of my guilty pleasures is dancing in my car to one of Mary J. Blige's latest singles, Work That. (The jam was in an Ipod commercial actually, so I'm sure you'd recognize it, the picture's posted below) You can't possibly not move when you hear that song....even if you're an uncoordinated, awkward cracker like myself.

--I'm really down for the idea of bringing back old expressions. A few years back, when I worked at my local pharmacy, I had a co-worker who was a miserable, yet oddly charming, old lady who ran the lottery machine. We called her "The Hag". Well anyways, Hag had a bunch of old zingers and I ate them up. My favorite was "why don't you take a long walk off a short pier". It's witty, it's vicious, it's pure awesomeness, plain and simple. That got me thinking of others. Like why don't we call certain women who fit the bill "firecrackers." I love it, and it should be brought back. (There are a million of these little old-timer sayings floating around, so keep you ear open to the elderly)

--I think one of the most nauseating things is hearing one human repeatedly give cliche advice to another. I want to make a law that says that you are only allowed to give a certain amount of cliche suggestions--a la "follow your heart"--per year, and they must be prefaced with the statement, "I know this sounds cliche, but I think it's relevant to your current predicament...INSERT CLICHE ADVICE HERE. The point is, if I'm having relationship troubles for instance, I don't want to hear someone tell me to "tell her how you feel" or something to that extent. Let's dig "deep within ourselves" (hahaha) people and find ways to build up others in a way that does not sound like a line out of a Hallmark ad.

--Now that my Ry-pod and I are coming up on our two year anniversary, I can't imagine life without it. I used to be an Ipod hater, just because it seemed like a dumb trend. Well, it definitely was a trend, but it was far from dumb. My car rides wouldn't be the same, and for that I thank you Mr.Pod.





As usual folks, thanks for wasting your time reading my nonsensical thoughts!!

Writer’s Block & Crazy People…………By: Crazy Person with Writer’s Block

Writer's Block. The E.D. of an astute penman. It will bring even the most sound of ink-thinkers to their wits end. There’s really no viable comparison to it in any profession. If you’re a professional athlete, you don’t just go through periods where you forget how to play the game completely. And if you go through a slump or an injury, guess what, you’re still getting your paycheck. If you’re a doctor, you don’t go through moments in the day where you completely forget where to make a surgical incision on a patient with a given sickness. (At least I sure hope not). If you are in a field that requires any form of creative writing, as I hope to be in someday, writer’s block is the most helpless feeling imaginable.

Feeling mentally incapacitated is not fun. I think sometimes that one of the main reasons I have not been locked up for a violent crime in my life is because I can transcribe those feelings into a song, a poem, or just a rant, and avoid possible outbursts on the public at large. I think that we as a society are unaware of just how close to the edge a good portion of the people around us actually are. That last sentence was wordy. The point I’m trying to get across is that many people around you at any given time are crazy. Sometimes, just a smile and a “hello” will give a person enough reason to cool down. Sometimes they need to write. Everyone has a friend who has at some point put them on their back and single-handedly carried them through a tough time. At certain points however, a stranger can get the job done just fine. And maybe your attempts to be a helpful citizen will be rewarded. I have a story about this…

I was at a bar a few years back, my favorite underage watering hole at the time actually, and two guys walked in. They looked really angry about something, I obviously had no idea what, but I was curious. So I watched them, sipping their Budweiser bottles conversation-less, looking around with glances of ill intent. Feeling a bit on the buzzed side myself, I decided to buy their next round. I went over and said something to the effect of, “you guys looked pissed off, and it’s the weekend, so I just thought it’d be good if you weren’t pissed off.” They both just laughed, more at me than with me, but their moods seemed to change. Upon finishing their brews, they ended up leaving the bar, seemingly with all destructive urges quelled, at least for the time being. Now I don’t know whether these guys left the bar and committed a triple-homicide, or whether they had no bad intentions to begin with. What I do know is that they exited the bar a lot calmer than they entered it, and they ended up leaving 50 bucks for me and my crew to spend after they bounced. (Completely side note, I think this is a solid story, and I feel I have amassed a good amount of stories like this over the years….word)


I think the best cure for writer’s block is just writing about having nothing to write about, because it often times can turn into something. I got from writer’s block to crazy people, and pretty smoothly actually. So yea, I think the major bullet points of this ridiculously scatter-brained blog are as follows:

• Writer’s Block sucks
• Crazy people are all around you
• Extend kind gestures to those who look crazy
• Random stories are pretty awesome
• Writer’s Block loses the battle this time….till we meet again my nemesis

Thanks for reading the ramblings of a madman.

Faith's Away

All I see are shades of gray
Hope is fleeting
Faith’s away
Will it return no ones knows
Darkness comes while
Faith derobes
Naked, cold, and frightened stiff
Faith fears questions
Pleads the fifth
Night comes early while day dies
Faith hides behind
Starless Skies
Future hurts and past regrets
Embodied in
Faithless Bets
Are these wagers poor attempts
To deny hell
Faith preempts
Existence not futile still
A lie that faith
Must fulfill
All I see are shades of gray
Hope is fleeting
Faith’s away

Mid-Winter Blues

A few years back, I was enjoying coffee and camel cigarettes at the Tom Jones Diner with a few close friends. I confessed that I had been feeling really lethargic for a good while. They were thoroughly amused by my statement, one because I tend to be overly dramatic from time to time, and two because, well, lethargic is a funny sounding word. You can't really hear someone say it in a serious sentence. My provisions of unintentional comedy aside, it was just a rough time of year. Women talk about that time of the month. Well this was that time of the year. It's the time of year in the winter, just after football season, and before there's anything else legitimately to look forward to. Uggggh, that time is now! If you're in school like I am, there's plenty of papers and projects to enhance the misery that is the Mid-Winter Blues. I'm not exactly sure how it feels for someone who is a full-time worker, but I imagine its pretty monotonous also.

Another problem with this time of year is that it always snows an inconvenient amount. (On the rare occasions Philly gets snow anymore) It's just enough to make traffic worse than usual and demolish hours of sleep/free time with shoveling and cleaning off the car, but normally not enough for school to be canceled. Normally I love the snow, but as you get older, it becomes more of a hassle. I just want to go back to the days where I could just play in the snow with friends and everyone was too young to have important obligations...or should I say still innocent enough to realize that many of life's "obligations" should be re-prioritized? I understand the values of hard work and commitment to an employer, but I also understand the dangers of becoming a cynical prick and losing the joys of youth, one such joy being a snowstorm.

So I'm just sitting here, lethargically typing away as I wait for something to break the norm. Sometimes, you just have to wait it out I guess, and hope that Wednesday night's LOST episode can hold ya over till the weekend. Who knows, I'm starting to get scatterbrained--even more so than usual--so I'm out...

LOST in Real Life (BY GUEST WRITER BRIAN MURPHY)

**Disclaimer** The opinions expressed in the following text are not to be taken personal. Please disregard appearance similarities. Most, if not all, have nothing to do with the comparisons drawn below. However, if you feel compelled to make yourself feel better, please believe that appearance is everything.


Jack Shepard (Brian Murphy)

Upon landing on the island, Jack (Brian) became an instantaneous leader of the survivors. He is determined to get the entire crew off the island (graduate college), safe and sound. The drama unfolds when Jack (Brian), a once clean shaven, sober individual who was focused only on his successes in the operating room (classroom), succumbs to the pressures of life off the island (bars and women). Pills and alcohol (booze and women) become his refuge, and the only place he can think to return to is the island (his apartment). Jack (Brian) has only one option left to complete this task, his once-rival, Benjamin Linus.

Benjamin Linus (Dan Ross)

Ben (Dan) is an unbelievably unique individual. He can be simultaneously play the heel and hero while never wavering from his ultimate game plan of once more seizing power (of a casino). Ben (Dan) has extreme passion for his beloved island (Phillies) and he will protect it at any cost, even human lives (rash insults). Ben (Dan) takes his orders from Jacob (Doyle Brunson), and lives his life (poker game) by them. Ben (Dan) is currently trying to get back to the island in hopes to rule again. Currently, the others are being ruled by John Locke.

John Locke (Ryan Lewis)

Before crashing on the island, John (Ryan) was wheelchair-bound for the remainder of his life after a tragic fall (high ankle sprain). However, on the island, John (Ryan) is a mobile (healthy ankle), new man deeply rooted in his faith (Christianity) and will not waver from his belief in fate and the inherent goodness of the island (Brian Dawkins). John (Ryan) is currently ruling the island alongside Richard Alpert. Throughout his time travels (personality changes), John (Ryan) finds himself in various predicaments all dependant on the time (mood) he is in.

Richard Alpert (Dennis Blanch)

Despite the duration of time that has transpired throughout LOST, Richard (Dennis) has maintained his same look (flowing hair). Richard (Dennis) has been Ben’s (Jake Blanch) right hand man (brother). Suddenly, the relationship has taken a new twist as John Locke (Jules Labradinger) is now in the picture. We left Richard (Dennis) being in control of the original others (WHHS) while in contact with his not-yet-born leader (Ryan Lewis).



James Ford “Sawyer” (Jake Kurz)

Sawyer (Jake) has come a long way from his days behind bars (lunchtime extortion). He now finds himself in a love triangle with Jack Shepard (Shawn Michaels) and Kate Austen (Randy Orton). Sawyer (Jake) is still on the island because he risked his own life by jumping from the helicopter (Septa Bus) to save the rest of his friends. Sawyer (Jake) does have one thing that he cares about deeply; his daughter (honey mustard). Sawyer (Jake) now relies on his brazen nature (wii bowling skills) to survive on the island.

Kate Austen (Colleen Nolan)

Kate (Colleen) is an individual who prefers the company of a man (Dennis), but a strong enough woman to survive on her own caring for her “child” (driving Kyle home) day-in and day-out. Kate (Colleen) was once imprisoned for murder (giving away meals at Halligans); however, on the island (college) Kate (Colleen) finds herself liberated from such reality. Kate (Colleen) refuses to return to the island (Ritas) because of the emotionally-traumatizing experiences she left there.

Hugo “Hurley” Reyes (Kevin “Paul Paul Vagina” Patterson)

Despite accusations that Hurley (Kevin) is an insane person (crazy person), Hurley (Kevin) may actually be the sanest (successful) person in the group of survivors. Following his lottery win (near death experience on the rugby field), Hurley (Kevin) was left to drastically reevaluate his life. Hurley (Kevin) doesn’t want the money so he allows his parents (Brian) to purchase anything they want (Oakleys). We left Hurley (Kevin) in police custody (teaching in North Philly).

Sayid Jarrah (Dave Million)

Before boarding Oceanic flight 815, Sayid (Dave) was a member of the Iraqi Republican Guard (US Air Force). There he learned many skills in torture (flying planes) that he has displayed numerous times on the island. Sayid (Dave) is now an associate of Ben Linus (Uncle Sam) who is keeping the group of survivors (United States) safe from the threat of Charles Widmore’s people (terrorists).

Desmond Hume (Daniel “DJ” Lacey)

Desmond (DJ) was one of the few people who was not on Oceanic flight 815 (attended HHS). Instead, Desmond (DJ) lived in a hatch (Media) that became his home for years to come. His passion was simple: reuniting with Penny Widmore (coaching hockey). Desmond (DJ) did whatever he had to (ride the train to the city) in order to fulfill this expectation (Flyers Youth Hockey Foundation).

Bernard Nadler (Jonathan Greenberg) and Rose Nadler (Melissa Arden)

Bernard (Jon) came upon the island with his wife (Melissa), who was suffering from cancer (long distance relationship), but is now miraculously healed. Bernard (Jon) brings his medical (masturbation) expertise to the island alongside Jack and Juliet. Bernard (Jon) also has knowledge of Morse code (Phillies ticket prices) that he uses for the betterment of life on the island (manipulating the system). Bernard (Jon) wanted to leave the island at first. However, Rose (Melissa) persuaded him to stay longer.


Daniel Faraday (Kevin Doran)

Starting at Oxford University (Penn State), Daniel (Doran) experimented with time travel (skipping class). This inevitably led to his dismissal (withdraw) from school. As a result of his experimentation (missed exams), his family (Hacksaw) forced him to leave home and find the answers (job) he needed. We left Daniel (Doran) on the island (Philly) struggling to dismantle a hydrogen bomb (working at 911).

Mike Check

Is there anyone cooler than Mike Tomlin? I was wondering last night as I sat watching the head coach of the Pittsburgh Steelers whether I would take anyone else in the League ahead of him to run my team. I think the answer is no. A 37 year old that looks like Omar Epps only bigger and more intimidating is a coach in the NFL? If there were a battle royale of NFL coaches, vegas would have Tomlin the heavy, HEAVY favorite to be the last one standing. I think he could take on a fair amount of players for that matter. I know its cliche to say he demands respect, but come on, this particular case would fit that cliche better than say, if the subject were Rich Kotite. He's always cool and collected on the sidelines, just sticking with his game plan and daring you to stop it. Sure he'll run a gimmick play here and there, but for the most part the scheme is out in the open. Pound the rock, protect the rock, win T.O.P. and let the defense abuse opposing offenses. ("It's not gonna be pretty. You can throw style points out the window," were Tomlin's words on the podium postgame). Play to the strengths of the players on the team, utilizing each man's unique God-given talent. The method won Tomlin's squad Super Bowl XLIII last night and the franchise's record 6th Lombardi Trophy. The guy was just as cool in the Post game press conference as he was at the most pressure-filled moments of the game, talking about how blessed he was that the Rooney family gave a young guy like himself a chance. He also sayed he vowed to reward their faith in him, and he obviously delivered on that in the biggest way possible. I would do anything for a coach like that in this city. I'm not holding my breath.

Far-from-Super Mood (Written Sunday 2/1/09)

It's Super Sunday, one of my favorite holidays of the year. Football, food loaded with fat and salt, entertainment, party atmosphere-- all staples of biggest sporting event on the calendar for Americans. The hype for this game is unmatched, which is probably why there is almost always some letdown. Normally this would be a 24-hour period in my life completely free from distractions and from any obligations to school or work. This, however, isn't a normal year. After the Birds let Arizona march the field for what ended up being the game-winning touchdown two sundays ago, I just can't get as pumped for the title game in Tampa. I have a 10-hour shift at work, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I can watch the game by myself here and there while on the clock, a situation that clearly reflects how I feel about SB43...it's in the background.

All day I've had the strangest feeling. It feels to me like I am missing an extremely important life event, but I don't know quite what the event is and I don't know why I'm missing it. It's like if my cousin had a wedding and I piled things on top of the invitation and months passed, then eventually I looked at my calendar when I woke up on February 1st, and said to myself, "Ry, you have something important today, but what the heck is it?" And on top of that, there is nothing else important today to supplant the thing I'm missing. I'm simply left to dwell on it all day, this lingering annoyance. Two weeks ago, I wrote about the energy that a true fan runs off of in the hours leading up to a huge game. Today, the test of one's fandom lies in their feelings on the Steelers-Cardinals matchup (which would have ridiculously low ratings by the way, if well, it wasn't the Super Bowl), specifically about if they can watch the game without constantly bitching in their own head about the NFC Championships "what ifs". You see, a true Eagles fan isn't over the loss because the season isn't over. You can't possibly watch a Warner deep out to Larry Fitz without thinking, where did we go wrong defensively in the first half. There's no way you can't think about the fact that we outplayed the Steelers in our 08 matchup with them, and maybe the matchup would go in our favor again. It will literally hurt as much as a helmet-less head crashing through a windshield watching Roethlisberger hold that Lombardi Trophy high. Just imagine Adrian Wilson yelling out to the faithful Cards fans at Raymond James that no one believed in them, and the Simmons article the following day about how the "no one believed in us" factor is now being bumped up to rule number 1 of his playoff manifesto. That could've been Donovan's line! He could've been the brunt of Simmons' favorite joke. Donovan could've been on that podium reading out the telephone numbers and addresses of the Dirty Thirty while slamming the trophy over Cataldi's head and my euphoria at that moment would not have been quelled (may actually have been enhanced). The image of Brian Dawkins crying his eyes out, speechless holding his SB MVP trophy after a 1-sack, 1-pick, 1-forced fumble game, is one that just will not leave me on this day. Shoot, I'd be crying my eyes out too. The only daze I'd be in would be one of utter joy if these things happened. But no, just an empty feeling there.


Today could have ended up being one of the 5 greatest of my life, I'm not sure what the others will end up being but I know if we had played in and won SB43, it would have been tatooed into the aformentioned list. Instead, I'm in this groggy, lackadaisical mood and feel as though I'm missing something important. This day is clearly the anti-Super, as greenbleeders everywhere again are left to think of what could have been...